SNL Reviews: Dave Chappelle/GloRilla (1/18/25)

 Today’s Retro Decimator Quote is…

“I’m rather ashamed to admit that I owned Bratz “Boyz” dolls when I was four years old. What? Why are you giving me those funny looks?” (from Selena Gomez/Post Malone, 2022)

Cold Open: MSNBC Report

The news keeps getting interrupted by ridiculous Trump stories.

• Sarah looks downright uncanny as Rachel Maddow. Her voice, however, sounds nothing like her, and the shitty dialogue doesn’t help, either.

• “Woke Sheldon”? Who writes this nonsense?!?

• Ha ha! They just cut to Andrew as Chris Hayes instead of Sarah! Get it? Because Rachel Maddow looks like a man!!!! Herp-a-derp!!!!

• The running “gag” with Marcello as Ari Melber responding with rap lyrics is awful.

• Another baffling attempt at a running gag is this bizarre thing with Stephanie Ruhle (Chloe) flirting with Maddow. I don’t know who this is for, but it certainly isn’t funny.

• Ha ha ha! Trump just mentioned…ugh, the “Rizzler”! It’s funny because he would never do that! Laugh, you sheeple! Laugh!!!!

• This is the only physical appearance JAJ makes in this entire episode! Why do you hate him so much?!??

• *Bowen enters as George Santos and I break into a million pieces* WHYYYYYYYYYYY?!!????????? WHY WHY WHY??!!!???????????? WHY HAVE THEY BROUGHT BACK THIS GODAWFUL “IMPRESSION” AGAIN????? HE’S NOT EVEN IN OFFICE ANYMORE!!!!!!!! I FUCKING HATE BOWEN YANG SO MUCH IT’S UNREAL AREJAUWGRKEJRVRVRBRRMRIEVRFWAL AS DVEJELENRRCRHEIEJEBEVEVEJWOWMWCJEYEUEDNRVEHROEIEVENEEKEU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

• *deep breaths* I’m back…sorry about that. I promise not to do that again. It’s just that Bowen Yang really brings out the worst in me.

• TLDR: This show fucking sucks.

Monologue

Dave Chappelle does the longest monologue ever!

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The Beatles Cartoon: A Guide To The Mixes (Seasons 2 & 3)

 Since Seasons 2 & 3 are so short, I decided to put their mixes into one post.

Season 2

“Eight Days A Week”: Mono mix, uncut. The sing-a-long version is missing the intro.

“Girl”: Mono mix, fades early. This song never became an episode.

“I’m Looking Through You”: US mono mix, minus the false starts at the beginning. Once again, John is incorrectly depicted as the singer.

“Help!”: Stereo mix, uncut. The mono mix has sloppier vocals, and it was that version which appeared in the movie. The sing-a-long version seen in Season 1 has a small edit near the end. This song was used as the theme song for Season 2, complete with the James Bond parody that precedes it on the American release.

“The Night Before”: Mono mix, the guitar part at the beginning is cut, and so is the solo. This song never became an episode.

“We Can Work It Out”: Mono mix, uncut.

“I’m Down”: Bizarrely, this song is at a lower pitch than it should be. Other than that, it’s the normal mono mix. This song never got a sing-a-long segment.

“Run For Your Life”: Once again, this song is at a lower pitch than it should be. The sing-a-long version also chops off the intro.

“Drive My Car”: Mono mix, uncut. This song was never made into a sing-a-long.

“Yesterday”: Mono mix, intro slightly trimmed. This song was never made into an episode.

“Tell Me What You See”: Mono mix, uncut. This song never got a sing-a-long.

“I Call Your Name”: Mono mix. Note how the cowbell starts right away during the intro. Stereo mixes of this song also have a different guitar.

“She’s A Woman”: US mono mix with extra reverb, uncut. This song was never made into an episode, and later reruns replace it with a repeat of “I Feel Fine”.

“The Word”: Mono mix, shortened. This song was never made into a sing-a-long.

“All My Loving”: Mono mix, uncut. The sing-a-long that aired in Season 1 cuts the instrumental break.

“Day Tripper”: Mono mix, uncut. Note how the tambourine briefly goes quiet to hide tape problems. The sing-a-long version is missing the intro.

“Nowhere Man”: Mono mix, uncut. The sing-a-long version is shortened.

“And I Love Her”: US mono mix. Note how Paul’s vocals are single-tracked for most of this version. This song was never made into an episode.

“Michelle”: Mono mix, heavily shortened. This song never got an episode.

“Paperback Writer”: Mono mix, uncut. Note the different echo at the end of the last verse.

Season 3

“Penny Lane”: Mono mix, uncut. The sing-a-long version cuts out the trumpet break and part of the final chorus.

“Rain”: Mono mix. The intro, the second chorus, and the backwards vocal part are cut. This song was never made into an episode.

“Strawberry Fields Forever”: Mono mix. The Mellotron intro is missing, and the song ends right before we hear John’s infamous “cranberry sauce”. The sing-a-long version is even shorter, ending before the final verse.

“And Your Bird Can Sing”: Mono mix, uncut. This song was used as the theme song for Season 3.

“Got To Get You Into My Life”: Mono mix, fades early. The sing-a-long version is even shorter.

“Good Day Sunshine”: Mono mix, uncut.

“Ticket To Ride”: Mono mix, uncut. The song can also be heard in several Season 1 episodes, such as “I’ll Be Back”, where the evil mountain men play a screwed up, distorted version of it on stage.

“Taxman”: Stereo mix, countdown cut. Note how the cowbell starts during the second chorus. It starts before that in the mono mix. This song was never made into a sing-a-long.

“Here, There, And Everywhere”: Mono mix, second verse cut. This song was never made into an episode.

“Eleanor Rigby”: Stereo mix, uncut. Note how the ADT accidentally continues into the first verse. Also, you have to laugh at the fact that the episode shows The Beatles playing along with their guitars, even though there is not a single guitar in the song.

“Tomorrow Never Knows”: Stereo mix, uncut. Note the feedback whistle after the backwards guitar break. Speaking of the guitar, the episode depicts it as someone blowing a giant horn, for some reason. This song was never made into a sing-a-long.

“She Said She Said”: Mono mix, shortened. This song was never made into an episode.

“I’ve Just Seen A Face”: Mono mix, uncut. This song was never made into a sing-a-long.

“Wait”: Mono mix, uncut.

“I’m Only Sleeping”: US mono mix. This version is missing a lot of the backwards guitar parts, and, in fact, was released before the song even came out in Britain. Since this is the last episode, there was no sing-a-long made for it.

The Beatles Cartoon: A Guide to the Mixes (Season 1)

 It’s been a long time since I made a post about this show, but I’m on a Beatles kick right now, so let’s do it.

Anyway, one unique thing about the Beatles cartoons is their unusual mixes of each song featured. While the show was in mono, a lot of the songs use their stereo mixes folded down to mono. Others were heavily chopped down for time.

“A Hard Day’s Night”: Mono mix. The instrumental break is missing, though it does appear in the intro for Season 1.

“I Want To Hold Your Hand”: Mono mix, uncut

“Do You Want To Know A Secret”: Mono mix, uncut 

“If I Fell”: Mono mix. Note how John’s intro is single-tracked instead of double-tracked like it is in the stereo version. Unfortunately, the song is heavily butchered, swapping the first and second verse for no apparent reason, and just repeating things willy-nilly.

“Please Mister Postman”: Mono mix, uncut

“Devil In Her Heart”: Mono mix, starts about a minute into the song. The sing-a-long version is uncut.

“Not A Second Time”: Mono mix, instrumental break cut. The sing-a-long version is uncut.

“Slow Down”: Mono mix, heavily shortened. The sing-a-long version is a little longer, but still missing several parts. The instrumental break also plays in the “Komm, Gib Mir Deine Hand” episode.

“Baby’s In Black”: Mono mix, cuts off before the instrumental break. The sing-a-long version is uncut.

“Misery”: Mono mix, uncut

“You Really Got A Hold On Me”: Mono mix, mostly uncut. The sing-a-long version is much shorter.

“Chains”: Mono mix, missing the harmonica intro.

“I’ll Get You”: Mono mix, first verse is cut. The sing-a-long version is uncut.

“Honey Don’t”: Mono mix, shortened. The sing-a-long version is also heavily cut.

“Any Time At All”: Mono mix, uncut. The sing-a-long version is missing the instrumental break.

“Twist And Shout”: Mono mix, uncut. The sing-a-long version is heavily cut.

“Little Child”: Mono mix, cuts off early. The sing-a-long is uncut. A bit of this song is also played at the end of the “Good Day Sunshine” episode in Season 3.

“I’ll Be Back”: Mono mix, shortened. The sing-a-long version is longer, but still slightly edited.

“Long Tall Sally”: Mono mix, uncut

“I’ll Cry Instead”: US mono mix, which has an extra verse that doesn’t appear in the UK mixes.

“I’ll Follow The Sun”: Mono mix. The final “I’ll Follow The Sun” is repeated a few times for some reason, but is otherwise uncut. This happens in the sing-a-long version too.

“When I Get Home”: US mono mix, uncut. Note how the double-tracking briefly disappears in this version when John sings “til I walk out that door”.

“Everybody’s Trying To Be My Baby”: Mono mix, starts about halfway through the song. The sing-a-long version is missing the instrumental break, which the version in the episode does include.

“I Should Have Known Better”: Mono mix, missing the instrumental break. The sing-a-long version is mostly the same, although it strangely edits a bit from later in the song at the very beginning.

“I’m A Loser”: Mono mix, uncut. The sing-a-long version shortens the harmonica break.

“I Wanna Be Your Man”: Mono mix, uncut. A funny, sped-up version is also played at the end of the episode.

“Don’t Bother Me”: Mono mix, uncut. The sing-a-long version is missing the instrumental break.

“No Reply”: Mono mix. Only about half of the song is heard in the episode. The sing-a-long version is mostly intact, except the first instance of “I nearly died” is cut.

“I’m Happy Just To Dance With You”: Mono mix, uncut.

“Mr. Moonlight”: Mono mix, uncut. The sing-a-long version is missing the organ break. Amusingly, the episode depicts Paul singing instead of John.

“Can’t Buy Me Love”: Mono mix, heavily shortened. The sing-a-long version is mostly intact, except the guitar solo is cut in half.

“It Won’t Be Long”: Mono mix, shortened. The sing-a-long version is even more butchered.

“Anna (Go To Him)”: Mono mix, shortened. The sing-a-long version is missing a bit at the beginning, but is otherwise uncut.

“I Don’t Want To Spoil The Party”: Mono mix, first chorus removed.

“Matchbox”: Mono mix, which you can tell by the way Ringo mumbles “your puppy dog runs”. The version heard in the episode is heavily shortened, while the sing-a-long version is mostly intact.

“Thank You Girl”: Stereo mix, uncut. Note the harmonica which is missing from the mono mix.

“From Me To You”: Stereo mix, uncut. Note the harmonica is absent from the intro.

“Boys”: Mono mix, uncut. There was no sing-a-long made for this episode.

“Dizzy Miss Lizzy”: Mono mix, shortened.

“I Saw Her Standing There”: Mono mix. The guitar solo is mostly cut, while the sing-a-long version cuts it entirely.

“What You’re Doing”: Mono mix, shortened. The sing-a-long version is slightly longer.

“Money (That’s What I Want)”: Mono mix, uncut. There was no sing-a-long made for this episode.

“Komm, Gib Mir Deine Hand”: Mono mix, uncut. For obvious reasons, there was no sing-a-long made for this episode.

“She Loves You”. Mono mix, uncut.

“Bad Boy”: Mono mix, uncut. The sing-a-long version is shortened.

“Tell Me Why”: US mono mix, as John’s vocals are single-tracked. The version in the episode starts abruptly at the vocals, while the sing-a-long version is uncut.

“I Feel Fine”: The US mixes of this song are infamous for their heavy reverb, and it is that version which appears here. The sing-a-long version is missing the feedback intro. A bit of this song is also played at the end of the “Eleanor Rigby” episode in Season 3.

“Hold Me Tight”: Mono mix, uncut. The sing-a-long version features a unique musical introduction before the song starts.

“Please Please Me”: Stereo mix, uncut. Note John’s vocal fluff in the final chorus, which is unique to the stereo version.

“There’s A Place”: Mono mix, uncut. The sing-a-long version is missing the harmonica intro.

“Roll Over Beethoven”: Mono mix, uncut. Paul’s “1-2-3-4!!!” from the beginning of “I Saw Her Standing There” is added. George’s rocking guitar intro is missing from the sing-a-long. For some reason, John is depicted as the singer instead of George.

“Rock And Roll Music”: Mono mix, uncut.