Friday, October 28, 2022

SNL Reviews: Selena Gomez/Post Malone (5/14/22)

 Cold Open

In which the Johnny Depp trial is poorly re-enacted.

• Oh, that’s right. I forgot all about this joke of a legal battle. For those who don’t know, Depp ended up winning.

• Kyle Mooney is not the greatest impressionist, as his take on Johnny Depp is proving. 

• Ugh, don’t tell me this going to be nothing but poop jokes…

• Kenan: “Smell like poopoo in here!” Okay, I admittedly did get a chuckle from that line.

• Another genuine laugh from Ego saying that the poop came from “a dehydrated adult”. 

• Yep, a few minutes later, and all they’re doing is making juvenile poopoo jokes. Oh, wait, I’m sorry. They’re actually saying “booboo” for some reason. How old are these writers? Did the censors not allow them to say “poop”?

• Poor Melissa is stuck playing a stereotypical Latina maid. I find it odd how she never used to be typecast as Hispanic characters, but that’s basically all she’s played in these last few episodes.

• Overall, this may possibly be one of the worst cold opens of the entire season.


Monologue

Selena Gomez talks about her new show with Steve Martin and Martin Short, and the fact that she is single.

• Gomez is one of those people that I’m surprised has never hosted this show before.

• A huge laugh from the photo of her with Barney the Dinosaur back in her days as a child actress.

• She gets in a good dig at Steve Martin’s love of the banjo.

• Why does her voice sound like she’s pinching her nose?

• I got a laugh out of her (intentionally?) poor impression of Miley Cyrus.

• Ha, she pronounces Colin’s name as “Colon Jost”! You can hear a lady in the audience giggle after she does that.

• I like the fakeout where it seems like Selena’s about to say that SNL is where Pete met Ariana Grande, only to say Machine Gun Kelly’s name instead.

• Kyle plays a pathetic loser for the 1,000th time. I love you, Kyle, but that shtick is starting to get a little old.

• It feels weird seeing James as himself. I also like Selena introducing him as “Jeff”.

• Punkie exists! Hearing the audience applaud her entrance is so satisfying.

• Overall, surprisingly strong for a Selena Gomez monologue.


Sketch: Bratz Dolls

A girl (Sarah Sherman) copes with her parents’ divorce by consulting her Bratz dolls.

• I’m rather ashamed to admit that I owned Bratz “Boyz” dolls when I was four years old. What? Why are you giving me those funny looks? 

• Amusing unintentional grammar fail (“whose parents gets divorced”) from Selena.

• Bowen is PERFECT for this role.

• Something about Selena’s delivery in this sketch is really sloppy.

• Not a big fan of Aidy’s character, but I love the detail of her thick doll lips.

• I got an unintentional laugh from the use of the same whip crack sound effect from the Haunted Elevator sketch with David S. Pumpkins (man, I wish I could be watching that right now).

• As I was expecting, this sketch was a whole lot of nothing. The only thing I liked was Sarah. She’s really believable as a young girl.


Film: Old Enough! Longterm Boyfriends!

The hit show that follows boyfriends as they run errands by themselves.

• This is based on some Japanese Netflix show that I’ve never seen, so I’m already weary of this premise.

• How many of these films does Cecily have to narrate?

• Hmm, overexplanation of jokes? Yep, this is a Seidell/Day sketch!

• I do like the fact that there’s some location filming in this. They’ve rarely done that since the outbreak of COVID.

• I could do without the onscreen subtitles. I’m sure that’s something from the show this is parodying, but they need to let the dialogue speak for itself.

• Yeah, this is way too reliant on the source material for me to find it funny.


Sketch: A Peek at Pico

Hispanic talk show people have funny voices and that’s pretty much the whole joke.

• My description up there says it all. Not only do we have another cliche talk show sketch, but it’s also a funny accent sketch where the hosts talk like Speedy Gonzales.

• Second Hispanic role for Melissa tonight. Again, I ask, why are we suddenly typecasting her when it’s clear by this point that she’s not coming back?

• Okay, why is the camera suddenly moving around like that? This wasn’t fixed in the online version.

• I like the name of Chris’s character: “Li’l Hubcap”

• Overall, yet another horrid talk show sketch.


Sketch: Irish Play

Understudies attempt to perform an Irish play.

• Kenan’s intro where he explains the conceit of this sketch already has me worried. Also, he makes a gratuitous penis joke for no reason.

• That intro goes on for fifty-eight seconds. I kid you not.

• ANOTHER funny accent sketch? Jesus, show us some mercy!

• Please stop bringing up the penis! It would have been funny if Kenan just mentioned it once during his intro, but they keep going back to it!

• As if you guys needed further proof that this sketch sucks balls, it was written by Kent Sublette. Couldn’t you tell by the accents?

• “Oh my God, this is horrible.” Don’t rub it in, Mikey. This sketch is bad enough without your explanations.

• No comment on the random inclusion of live animals.

• The ending with Bowen unzipping his pants and showing off his penis was just horrible. Definitely a contender for the worst sketch of the season.


Film: American Inventors

We take a look back at when Archie Gizmo (Steve Martin) invented the whoopee cushion.

• Ah, for once I’m glad to see a gratuitous cameo. Hopefully Steve can save this rapidly-deteriorating episode.

• Not caring for the montage of fart sounds.

• Perfect casting of JAJ as a retro newscaster.

• For some reason, the “retro” scenes in this remind me of a Schiller’s Reel.

• I laughed harder than I should have at Aidy randomly getting struck by lightning.

• Even the constant repeats of the lightning gag are working for me because of Aidy’s surprisingly strong performance.

• I like how the fake retro magazine covers use actual pictures of Steve from the 70s.

• The picture of Aidy getting zapped while Sammy Davis Jr. looks on was hilarious.

• A great finale where we see how ragged she looks in the present day, followed by one more zap from the joy buzzer.

• Wow, somehow we managed to follow up the worst sketch ever with one of the best of this entire season! Steve, you’ve worked your magic again!


Musical Performance: “Cooped Up”


Weekend Update (featuring Baby Yoda and Sarah Sherman)

• Great, jokes about trying to feed babies things they shouldn’t eat. /sarcasm

• They’re still doing the Mitch McConnell “seen here” jokes. Please stop it.

• Nice ballsy joke from Che about how the iPod Touch has been around longer than “the kids who make them”.

• FUUUUCK!!!! Baby Yoda once again!!! Thankfully, this is the last time we ever see him before Kyle leaves!

• I’m amazed that this character has made six fucking appearances without being funny in a single one of them. It takes some special talent to do that. Just ask Fred Armisen and Kristen Wiig!

• Whew, here comes Sarah to save this Update. This time, she’s doing something a little different by taking us backstage.

• Speaking of Wiig, I groaned a little when Sarah brings her up as a “legend” on the same level as Will Ferrell.

• Her typical Update routine of insulting Colin is a little fresher here.

• Was Sarah’s “Daily Affirmations” reference intentional? I can’t imagine she would be familiar with those sketches.

• I love the Post-it note on Colin’s mirror that reminds him about his alleged upcoming dinner with Giuliani.

• Another laugh from the Sarah shrine that she obviously put in there.

• I wonder who the guy in the “intern cage” is.

• The fake newspaper headline was a great way to end this. Sarah continues to impress me.


Sketch: The Three Daughters

A prince (Mikey Day) must choose which princess to make his bride.

• It’s become a running gag among fans to note how bad Mikey is at British accents. As we see in this sketch, that is totally the case.

• Kate isn’t annoying me so far, but I’m sure that’s not going to last.

• The thing that IS annoying me in this sketch is Kenan. I am so tired of that hammy voice he keeps doing. No matter how many new cast members come through, he’ll still be there doing his same old shtick for the rest of time.

• Super obvious ending where it turns out that Kate‘s character really is weird.


Film: Intuition

A couple’s relationship gets influenced by their intuition.

• Sweet! A lead role for Punkie! And she gets to rap!

• The lyrics could be better, but she’s making this work.

• Fun twist where it turns out that Chris’s character has an “intuition” too (played by Post Malone).

• Despite my initial misgivings regarding the lyrics, this was okay.


Sketch: Guidance Counselors

Guidance counselors give students advice.

• I like how the high school is randomly named after Ol’ Dirty Bastard.

• Selena looks really sexy in that dress.

• I laughed at Ego asking a student if he wants to live in Paris or Syracuse, though that may be because I have grandparents who used to live in Syracuse.

• This is more of an unintentional laugh, but Sarah is wearing a sweater that says “SATURDAY” on it, and the only letters visible for much of the sketch are “TURD”.

• Another sketch that just ends with a random dance party.


Musical Performance: “Love/Hate Letter to Alcohol”


Sketch: Baby Monitor

Babies keep interrupting a rowdy group of teenagers trying to party.

• This sketch gives us a somewhat creepy visual of Sarah and Bowen dressed like babies. Is this SNL or Children of the Damned?

• Selena’s delivery in this sketch is so awful. What the hell is wrong with her voice tonight? The part where she asks her friends if they want to have some beer was particularly hard to listen to.

• Yikes, and now the babies are staring at the camera with blank, empty eyes.

• This just gets more and more disturbing as it goes on. And yet I can’t keep my eyes off of it.

• Fairly funny part where Baby Bowen swings a Baby Sarah dummy around.

• Um, now there’s a Baby Post Malone in there with them. He’s clearly having a good time, because he can’t stop laughing!

• The ending where it turns out that the babies are actually watching them was kind of lame.

• This was slightly below the usual standards of Sarah’s sketches, but I admire how bizarre it is.


Final thoughts: This is a hard episode for me to figure out. On one hand, we have some of the worst material of the entire season, yet we also have that great Inventor short film. Selena Gomez herself seemed to be out of it for the whole episode. Something about her was a little sloppy, and I don’t know why.


Best sketches: Monologue, American Inventors, Sarah’s commentary, Intuition

Worst sketches: Cold Open, A Peek at Pico, Irish Play, Baby Yoda commentary 


Next review: Natasha Lyonne/Japanese Breakfast. We also bid farewell to Kate McKinnon, Aidy Bryant, and a fuck-ton of other cast members.

No comments:

Post a Comment