Cold Open
Donald Trump promotes his new album.
• Ugh. Not Trump again.
• Haha, Trump just made a reference to The Office! You see, it’s funny because the real Trump wouldn’t do that!
• This gets even worse when he starts…singing. Yeah, this has suddenly turned into an ad for a cover album. Why? I don’t fucking know.
• I know I keep saying this, but it’s so awkward seeing Mikey as Trump Jr. without Alex as Eric. Why do they keep making him show up if his partner isn’t there anymore?!?
Monologue
Quinta talks about working on Abbott Elementary and how poorly teachers are treated in America.
• I must confess that I have never heard of this woman before.
• Kind of a cheap and easy way of getting applause when she says that her show is like Friends except that it has black people in it.
• No comment on the Obama cameo.
• Despite all of those negative things, Quinta is very charming here, especially with her talk about how our public school teachers need more respect.
Sketch: Drug Dealer
Things get competitive between drug dealers in a nightclub bathroom.
• I absolutely love how the first two people we see in this are Andrew and Devon, who are some of the brightest stars of this mediocre season.
• Marcello’s already cracking me up with his drug dealer character.
• Is Quinta’s character supposed to be male? She has a goatee.
• Quinta: “My stuff is so white, it’s like Gwyneth Paltrow skiing in Utah.”
• Marcello: “My stuff is so pure white, it’s like the guy that’s suing Gwyneth Paltrow!”
• All of the various comparisons they’re making to their crack are very funny.
• Even Kenan got a laugh out of me when he started singing “Last Resort” by Papa Roach for no reason.
• Michael Longfellow’s camouflaged character that appears out of nowhere is hilarious. I love how he’s about to tell them how black his heroin is, but then notices that the room is filled with black people and wisely backs off.
• I’m surprised at how much I enjoyed this given that it has only one joke.
Film: I Was A Bridesmaid
The horrors of being a bridesmaid.
• I see that Jimmy Fowlie wrote this sketch. Hopefully that’s not a bad omen…
• Is this a parody of a real Netflix documentary or is it just some shit they made up?
• As soon as James’ character mentioned gay men, I knew that Bowen was going to show up as a stereotypical gay man.
• Interesting seeing Molly play this type of role, along with using a slightly higher voice than their usual pitch.
• The various pictures of the bridesmaids terrorizing gay bars are pretty humorous.
• While this wasn’t as bad as I was expecting, I feel like I would have gotten more out of it if I knew what it was parodying.
Sketch: Couple Goals
Couples on a game show answer questions to see how well they know each other.
• No comment on James’ host character being named “Bob Dabilda”.
• Punkie has gotten a lot of air time in this episode. Too bad I know it’s not going to last because our next episode doesn’t have a black host.
• Kenan surprisingly hasn’t been annoying me tonight. His character here is acting pretty normal by his recent standards.
• I love the look on James’ face after the brief cutaway to Kenan’s decrepit mother being force fed.
• Odd ending where the camera zooms in on Kenan screaming “NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!”
Sketch: Traffic Altercation
Two drivers argue while stuck in traffic
• I feel like we’ve barely seen Mikey lately. The writing is clearly on the wall for him.
• Some interesting and unusual camera angles.
• According to one person in the comments, a few of the signs that Mikey and Quinta are doing are actually real ASL signs.
• Yay, Mikey’s explaining stuff again!
• Okay, this sketch is kind of starting to drag on for me. I wish it was cut down a little bit.
Musical Performance: “The Black Seminole”
Weekend Update (featuring the Statue of David and Marcello Hernandez)
• We start with a bunch of bland Trump jokes.
• They’ve really got to stop doing the jokes about Colin secretly being a Trump supporter/white supremacist. It doesn’t help that this particular joke is apparently so funny that it leaves these two buffoons with the giggles for a few minutes.
• Yet another commentary for Michael Longfellow, this time as the Statue of David. Apparently there was some controversy that week about a picture of the statue being included in grade-school curriculum.
• Some excellent makeup on Michael.
• I love the part where he screams as he turns his head to look at Che, accompanied by “statue” sounds.
• I’m surprised they were allowed to show his rock pubes.
• Not the funniest commentary ever, but Longfellow is great as usual.
• Is tonight the night of the featured players or something? Now it’s time for Marcello to give another commentary!
• When bringing up “short kings”, I like how one of the people he mentions is Martin Short.
• Another great example of his fast paced Spanish delivery.
• Colin: “Armie Hammer is not 7’3!” Marcello: “Oh, I’m sorry, I forgot you were friends!”
• It warms my heart to hear Marcello get all this applause. He’s certainly deserved it with all of the great commentaries he’s had this season!
Sketch: Midwife
A doctor and a midwife have a tense discussion in the delivery room.
• I groaned as soon as Bowen entered as yet another CUH-RAYZEE character. This sketch was co-written by him and Jimmy Fowlie, so I expect this to get even worse as it goes on.
• Now this suddenly changes to three years in the future? What is going on?!?
• And now we’re back in the past? What even is this sketch?!??
• Now Bowen just cracked up during one of his lines. Please end this shit now!!!!
Musical Performance: “Drive Me Crazy!”
Sketch: Bosses
Two bosses harass a new employee.
• Sarah in drag again? I don’t like how this has become a common thing for her.
• Despite my initial worries, Sarah is absolutely perfect in this role.
• And now Quinta just showed up in drag as well.
• I’m sure you know I’m not caring for the reacting and explaining parts of this sketch.
• This was surprisingly weak for a Sarah sketch, not helped by the over-reliance on women in drag.
Please Don’t Destroy: Street Eats
The guys show off some of the finest street cuisine in NYC.
• Fourth episode in a row with a PDD short.
• Kind of strange how they’re not using their real names in this one, but I like how Ben’s character name is “Domhnall Trump”.
• I like seeing these guys on the street for once.
• I love the random scene with the old black man telling Ben to shut up.
• Another laugh from their awkward attempts at sounding Jamaican.
• Punkie gets a good quick scene where she makes them shut off their camera in the restaurant.
• I love how they show a map of the locations they go to, but the pins on the map of the US are all in the same spot.
• Funny scene of Marcello randomly assaulting John.
• Martin, to a bunch of construction workers: “I hope the building you’re working on explodes!”
• I love the glimpse we get of the negative comments on their video, most of which are heavily censored.
• Great ending where they get hit by a car.
Final thoughts: Another extremely bipolar episode. The good stuff was really good, while the bad stuff was horrendous, especially that god-awful Bowen mugfest.
Best sketches: Drug Dealers, Marcello’s commentary, Street Eats
Worst sketches: Cold Open, Midwife, Bosses
Next review: Molly Shannon/Jonas Brothers